I thought about doing this for a while now.. so here it is. You might wonder why I bitch or have a problem with certain people.. here is why leading up to the present.
I got into SL Porn after seeing a few of Emma's movie at the Keyhole club. Found her blog and joined pornstars. Later that day I attended some party (labor day?) at Hard Alley. I eventually ended up talking and dancing with Emma. Eventually, I teleported her to a small club where I was escorting out and and had sex. At first I was overwhelmed, the movies at Keyhole club, her blog.. I thought she was someone famous in Second life. The sex.. at the time I guess I thought it was good, but then a few days later looking back at it. Seemed like she was distracted, like in a Im with someone else.. there was alot of "mmmmmmm" and "yes miss". Let's just say being a escort, I was used to more interaction with the person I was with.
I IMed her a few more times after that, but she seemed to be busy working on her new movie La Cagna Ricca. I passed along I had a blog now.. she blogged it, but never officially followed my blog. Never, ever.
No big deal, I went on my own way. I met Alyssa Drechsler who I was a extra for in two movies and feature in another. Alyssa is how I got into making movies myself. She made it look so easy and was so professional. She helped me render my first video and I cannot say one damn thing bad about her. Not only is she a great story teller, but a great person.
So I made my first movie, Justin Love. Naughty Machinima had been down at the time and shortly after it came back up. I along with many other people uploaded my video to Naughty Machinima.
Soon after Emma blogged all the movies uploaded to Naughty Machinima.. well all but mine.
I went on to produce "Dommaidatrix" my 2nd movie which ended up being featured on NM. I was still a Pornstar in training and couldn't send out notices at this point. Emma was online and I IMed her to ask if I can have access to send notices like the rest of the people making movies. I got no response. This happened twice. Ivori Faith was interviewing her and this was when I was on the verge of producing "Sinderella". I told Ivori I didn't think Emma liked me because She wasnt following my blog, but was just about everyone else's. Blogged all the new uploads on NM but mine and was ignoring my IMs. So Ivori said she would talk to her when she interviewed her. So I got online late one night and she was online. I said to myself this was going to be the last time I ask. I IMed her and she actually responded and gave me the ability to send out notices.
So I produced my third movie, Sinderella. Emma blog it.. honestly I never paid attention to her blog didn't know she did, until she IMed me and told me. She also mentioned something about being in one of my movies. I never took it serious and at that stage, three movies in and I thought I was doing good for someone new.. I didn't care about working with big names, since they didn't do a single thing for me. I was all set to make my own "stars".
After my movie Rayven and Serenity's sexcellent adventure is where all this other stuff started to happen. I started to form my own opinions about the Pornstars group and people in it. I sort of got tired of getting force fed this person is a big star and this person is a big star, yet in my eyes I just didn't see why. Afterall, shouldn't it be the viewers choice who the "stars" are, not a few different people?
So I blogged who I thought were the "stars" of the community twinkle-twinkle-little-star In this post I used Krystal Pearl (but since was edited out) as an example. My whole point was just sitting on a pose ball wasn't enough that anyone can do it. (which I still believe) You had to do more in the community, have a blog, do photography. Well, this didn't sit well with some people.
So next day I was at lunch at work and got on SL through my cell phone. Next thing I know, Aurora is calling me out in Porn stars chat. Wow, how did she know the second I jumped online to start ranting and raving. I smelled a rat.. so I looked at my friends list and Quinn Ying's name stood right out. Well, I didn't say anything in chat. I let Aurora be Aurora. Let her take in all the attention.
Later that night I was on SL, I didn't even have pornstars chat open and someone IMed me telling me Krystall Pearl was calling me names in Pornstars chat. So I joined and was called a Bitch about 10 times. Then Amykins Moonwall jumps in and calls me a bitch too. Of course they were both newly promoted moderators of the porn stars groups doing a fine job.
I hear from Aurora herself Quinn Ying took it upon herself to orgazine a meeting with some of the pornstars moderators to kick me from PornstarsPornstars chat. Not all the moderators, just the ones of her choosing. At this point I had done nothing in pornstars group or chat except be a victim of others slander, but Im trying to be kicked? lol.
So eventually I talk to Emma, who right away makes and excuse for Krystall saying I can understand why she would be upset and would do that (more on this hypocrisy later)
So I end up writing an apology, which at the time I meant everything I wrote. my-confession
So I'm thinking I would lead by example and the other parties would do the same. Did Scooby, Aurora, Quinn, Krystall, Amykins? Nope. Quinn left some strange message on my blog about the directior Rayven returning.. to me it made me sound like Dr. Jackyl and Mr. Hyde. Then Amykins comes on my Blog and says she don't take back calling me a bitch. Wow, talk about a insult and a slap in the face. So I felt like a total sucker.. I went out of my way to try to make amends and these people are not only getting a free pass, but are insulting me. So this is basically why this stuff started back up.
So Dec. one day while xmas shopping a few people decided to make 9 new accounts on NM and vote my movies all 1 star, My movies at that point were all 5 star ratings and dropped to three stars. Then there was a point were Scooby went on my movie Dommaidatrix and was leaving comments how bad it was and telling me to blog him. So guess what? I did. salute-to-fine-sl-director.
Basically took some quick screen shots of a handful of his movies to show the lackluster effort put into editing them. So he comes on my blog and leaves a bunch on comments, two were posted the other 3 were blocked by the spam blocking and one of the things he bought up was my deceased Grandmother, who I dedicated a video to. Then he ran off and one again told Emma.
This is when I got my punishment from the Pornstars group. Once again I didn't do anything within the group. Scooby was taunting me to blog him and well, I just did what he asked. Then when he went crying to Emma because he didn't like what he saw.. then it became a issue.
So somehow I got twice the punishment, which in turn I never came off punishment but Scooby's was cut short.
Emma tells me she still wants to be my friend and would like to do a movie with me. Which I found funny, she wants to be my friend, but don't follow my blog? Then I tell her how can you be my friend when you just gave me a worse punishment for doing less? She said because I wrote that apology on my blog and didn't mean it. lol/
Yea, well at least I made a effort.. while none of her friends did.. they all just got a free pass. Then I had people coming on my blog saying stuff. That was ignored .. She also claimed she don't play favorites. Yea, ok. Good one At this point I realized anything on her blog or out of her mouth was complete bullshit.
So awards is coming - I have no intention on taking part. She talks me into doing it at the last second. She filled out my ballots not me. All I did was send in the money. She tell me the judges would be from outside of the pornstars group and little or no contact between them. So about a week later she is blogging two of the judges photos.
I question her about it. I thought she just got caught up in the awards show. Honestly, I expected her to say something to the effect she didn't realize it. Instead she claimed she wanted to show everyone the judges were qualified. That La Cagna Ricca wasnt her movie it was Aprille Shepard's she was only hired to direct it. (kind of funny I was under the impression along with everyone else it was her movie or half owner of the movie, but she sort of tired to separate herself from it at this point) She also said the awards show was just for a prim award like it was no big deal. Well if that's the case why make it sounds like it's the event of the century?
So I replied that there was no need to show the judges were qualified since they were already selected. We werent picking judges, they were already picked. Showcasing two of 10 judges didnt make sense.
I asked her if she had ever sat in on a jury. If the judge and defending attorney would think it was ok if the prosecuting attorney did a favor for two of the people on the jury.
At this point she accused me and saying she was cheating, which I wasn't. My point was she was soiling the integrity of the judging process. Afterall, this was billed as a impartial judging process with little or no contact between the judges and everyone else. So she gave me my money back and said the show was on her. Which, like I said I didnt expect to do well and the only reason I stayed in it was to be a spoiler to prevent certain other people from getting Nominated